Note to Self

Wake up before everyone else, and make sure not to move the covers too much or he’ll be upset again. Brush your teeth, wash your face, and then head out to the kitchen. Don’t forget to wear slippers and walk quietly in the house or else you’ll wake him up and he’ll be upset. I’d rather that not happen. Go walk the dog but make sure to have the dog on a leash in the house or else the dog will run around the house and wake everyone up. Head to the kitchen, turn on the lights (but only the one by the stove.) Count the eggs and figure out when you have to head to the supermarket so you can ask him for the car. Ponder about what to make, but only for a maximum of five minutes, or else you might accidentally spend too much time thinking about what to cook than actually cooking. Remember to put down the cutting board on top of a plastic cover or else the board might scratch the stainless steel kitchen counter. Close the moving glass doors of the kitchen so that way no one can hear you cooking. Call Mom to make sure she remembers to eat her medication. Prepare the breakfast table and remember that he sits in the middle with two forks to the left and one knife along with a spoon to the right. Pick a table mat that matches the flowers in the vase. Put the food down on the center of the table, and wake him up first for breakfast. Never shout, only speak softly with him. It’s not worth the fight. Head to the children and force them up, make sure they get to the breakfast table before he does. If the kids are being difficult, buy time and head back to his room and check if he’s up or not. If he’s up, small talk. If he’s not, gently try waking him up again. Check on the children again, if they are up tell them to eat first instead of washing up. Toast the bread when he’s at the table to make sure it’s warm. Wait for everyone else to eat first then sit down. Once everyone is finished and has left the table, wash the dishes. Prepare fruits just in case he gets hungry again. Get his jacket for him and find his car keys. Walk him out to the front door. Kiss him. Watch him get on the car and drive away. Empty the coffee grounds before you make your coffee. Don’t think too much about this loveless marriage.